Posted by: minnow | August 2, 2008

PORN

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary pornography is the depiction in either picture or written form of erotic behavior intended to cause sexual excitement; or a sensational depiction in order to cause an intense emotional response, as in the violence of pornography.  In a 2003 survey by the Internet Filter Review 47% of the Christians they surveyed confessed that the use of pornography was a major problem in their lives.  A leadership survey done by Christianity Today in 2001 indicated that 37% (of leadership) had viewed pornography in the month prior to taking the survey and 57% of the men attending a Promise Keepers event indicated they used pornography weekly.  In a survey of 6000 pastors conducted by the Saddleback Church in 2002 30% said they viewed pornography monthly.  And just so the men do not think I am only picking on them, a 2003 article in Today’s Christian Women reported that one in six women admitted they struggled with a pornography addiction.  That is 17%.  Sadly, many more women live in denial of their problem.  They may read erotic romance novels but convince themselves nothing is wrong since they don’t look at any pictures.  Sounds a little like what people said when they were caught with a Playboy under their bed, “I get it for the articles”. 

What is being done?!  Tragically, the answer is very little.  Some organizations, like XXXChurch.com, are doing their part.  Yet the problem of pornography within the Church is huge and few local congregations allocate any resources to deal with it, in part because leadership is almost as trapped as the rest of us.  Still, we cannot let that become an excuse to do nothing.  The cost is simply too great.

While the Promise Keep statistic I quoted above may seem overwhelming we can look at it another way as well.  At least these men came forward.  They recognized they have a problem.  They took a huge first step.  Now the rest of us must help them finish the journey they started, the journey to become free of the burden of their addiction.

Exposing the ugly truth about pornography can help both men and women have the motivation to break the bondage.  For example, when we are told that many of the on-screen participants spend their off screen time throwing up in the bathroom or getting high just to make it through the shoot the lie that “they like it” is broken.  Sadly the on screen participants suffer in multiple other ways as well.  The education some use their “big bucks” to get is often wasted since once their face is connected to porn it is nearly impossible to take back.  And, let’s be real “I was a porn star” is not exactly resume material when you want to be a lawyer, CPA, teacher…  Finally, disease and age can also take their toll.

While pornography is a billion dollar industry, the cost of pornography to the consumer cannot be measured in dollars and cents alone.  Like other addictions, porn consumers often needs a higher high to produce the same results.  More time, more money, more graphic details can lead to greater personal risk, loss of jobs, and in some cases, jail time.  Relational costs are equally extreme.  Marriages fail, families are torn apart, and individuals are left very much alone, shunned by family, friends, and more than likely any religious community they may belong to.

So, what is the worst case senario for someone who wants to get free?  Contact XXXChurch.com. Seriously.  If you can find no help, no safe person or place, go on-line to XXXChurch.com.  Helping people who want it is what they do.  They help spouses, families, and individuals.  They have accountability software you can download.  And, they do not cast stones.

I have a friend who gets angry at the Church for acting like the personal piety issues are the biggest sins.  I would agree with her, to a point, and that being when the Church stands back clicking its tongue and shaking its finger at those caught in sexual sin without recognizing its own hypocrisy or culpability I stand with my friend.  I am also not a real fan of sin that seem to slide under the radar, like: gossip or greed or pride.  On the other hand, if instead of clicking its tongue and shaking its finger the Church reaches into the muck and the mire to help pull somebody out, then focusing on the personal piety issues might be exactly what needs to happen.  If your fellowship does not have an accountability small group–start one–especially if you are one of the few who have been there, done that, and are free. 

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Responses

  1. Minnow – I lost your email – can u contact me 🙂

  2. It is amazing how pervasive pornography is today. It is such a difficult thing to avoid if you are around any kind of media or Internet access.

    You mentioned the accountability software from XXXchurch. Have you heard of Covenant Eyes accountability software?

    Covenant Eyes has a promotional code you can use to get a free month to try out their accountability service. Go to http://www.covenanteyes.com and enter promocode ‘onefree’ to receive a free 30 day trial of the program.

  3. Thank you Luke for another resource!!

  4. I would like to say that i love your site minnowspeaks.wordpress.com a lot
    now.. back on topic haha
    I cant say that im 100% with what you wrote… care to explain more?


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